Its going down, I'm yelling TINDERRRR!!!!
Today’s quick topic has got to be Tinder. The interactive
dating app that lets you view a profile picture and quick description of a
person, and decide if you want to do them! Perfect! At the end of the
interaction, if you’ve both agreed you want to potentially see each other naked
to some capacity, congratulations! A screen comes up telling you that you have a
match and you’re free to make small talk and try and get together with them.
This may seem a little bit of a backwards process wanting to get in someone's pants before wanting to get in their heart and mind, but - #YOLO
This may seem a little bit of a backwards process wanting to get in someone's pants before wanting to get in their heart and mind, but - #YOLO
Yes, this is actually a thing. People genuinely think they
will meet the love of their life by first judging them solely on their
appearance. By the year 2030, there is going to be an entire generation of kids
born of a wine-fuelled Tinder hookup. Great!
Best part about this is it works on Wi-Fi proximity signals
and geo-locating software, so you get to choose from singles in your general
area, anywhere you are in the world! This is great if you’re travelling and want to do
something crazy while in Vegas, or if you’re just trying to find a cute gal to
give you a ride to an airport.
Still interested? Perfect! Here’s some sure fire ways to
have if nothing else, FUN while using Tinder. Without epically failing the
excitement factor by starting to get to know someone with something boring like
“hey, how are you?" because that's what you call, fucking boring. Here's a free opener for a guy to strike up a conversation - this one's free from me ;) 
Ladies, If you matched with a guy solely because he has a really cute dog (this happens), why not get to know them enough to set up a date, and make sure they bring their puppy along with a series of dog related puns:
Bring the dog! no pugs no hugs, no ruff no muff, no stray no play, no mutt no butt. and POOF! you make a new furry friend!
Sometimes even after you get a match, you don’t ever end up
speaking with them. I always assume this is because the girl is too afraid to
hangout because she’s not actually as attractive as her profile picture in person and doesn't want
to come to terms with the fact that her selfie-game is just too damn strong.
I just can’t bring myself to take Tinder seriously so I just
have fun while using it, like its a game. If someone doesn’t like me back on this app, I just
assume they've died or had their phone stolen so it doesn’t hurt my self-esteem.
Whenever I do get a match from a hot girl, I first assume it’s
really 4 guys in a dorm room who set up a fake profile and are now somewhere laughing at me. Yet despite my total
lack of faith in this process, I occasionally continue to swipe right if I like
the person, swipe left if I don’t, or cry because my life has come to this.
If a girl goes into this looking to meet the right guy for a
relationship, she may ask herself “Does every guy on Tinder just want to hook
up?” let me answer that:
Yes. You know who else is looking to hook up? Pretty much
every guy you’ve ever met in any way ever. Guys want to hook up first and meet
you later. Whether or not you meet them in a bar, online, through friends, a
blind date, or even from making eye contact with a
guy (he has already hooked up with the idea of you).
So in this sense it really doesn’t matter how you guys met,
even if the idea of it being on Tinder is a weird one (he was probably pooping
when he swiped right for you). Therefore ladies, once you’ve come to terms with that,
you can start getting to know the guy across the table from you on this date that has intentions your father would frown upon, and maybe even enjoy his company.
So having said that, guys, if you’re not looking for a relationship, maybe just go about it in a funny or intelligent way. you never
know, she might still be into you!
Here’s one I used as an example – didn’t work (she probably lost her phone), but hey, think outside the box. No girl wants a scrub
hanging out his best friend's ride. Check
it:
If you don’t have Tinder and you’re single, get it! At least
you’ll have something fun to do while killing time that is way easier than
Flappy Bird. And on the plus side, you might get lucky!
Just a post for fun and laughs, like, steal, share as you
wish.
-Jegger
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