The response I got was great! Lots of contributions in the works, and hopefully many more to come!
First guest post comes from my friend Katelyn, check her out
Instagram: @rockette55
Twitter: @rockette_55
I
remember the first time I ever used a computer was when I was in elementary school. I
lived in a relatively small, but growing, town that had 2 main roads. When I
wanted to contact a friend outside of school I would either have to walk to
their house, or call them from a landline telephone. 50/50 chance of social interaction
based on whether they were home or not. But with the Internet growing, so did
social media. Soon I had many messaging systems to contact my friends: MSN
Messenger, Nexopia, Myspace, to name a few.
My Mother worked for a phone company and I
finally got my first cell phone for my fifteenth birthday (2003). Sadly, my birthday
is late in the year and most of my friends already had one. It had basic
calling and I remember when I first started to send text messages there was a
lot of arguments with my parents as to whether or not I should be allowed that
privilege. Obviously, my parents caved to my pleas and the technological
takeover began.
My cell phone came with me everywhere and I
was always in contact with my friends. Texting during class became common
with everyone I knew. I could talk to friends about what we were
doing after work, while I was at work, on Friday nights. It was easy and became
second nature. It’s still engrained in me and is a part of my life to this day.
It’s pretty obvious that I’m not the only one who has this habit. People text
back and forth while at work, driving, at the gym, or at home. One thing I have
noticed is that the number of phone calls on my phone has decreased
drastically. This is where the gap of human intimacy becomes so obvious.
This social gap I speak of is obvious to
people of my generation or older. There are certain social “faux pas” that we
are aware of that the younger generations haven’t quite caught onto. Unwritten rules of etiquette, like keeping your cell phone in your purse on dates or having
unimportant phone conversations with a friend while you’re out with another
friend having coffee. Those are just a few examples. This gap has transferred
over into almost everything, including the world of dating.
As a 25 year old, single female who is
currently venturing in this dating world, there are a few things different than
from our parent’s generation. In the past few years of dating I have ventured
into online dating and most recently, dating apps. To be more specific as to
which app it is, I will admit that I joined Tinder a few months ago. I know
this app has a stigma for being a “hook-up” app but I was honestly looking for
a relationship. And as of a few weeks ago, I thought I had found one.
I had started talking to a few people using
the app and agreed to meet a couple of them. The first date I went on was for
drinks with a guy that lived in my area. He was a couple years younger than me
but we really seemed to hit it off. Next
thing you knew it was our third and our fourth date and it seemed to be getting
relatively serious. I guess serious isn’t the right word to describe it really.
Exclusive, lets say. A word I have a hard time using. I would be lying if I didn’t admit
the fact that over the past few years I’ve been a bit of a serial dater and
that I’ve had a hard time committing to seeing just one person. This was new
territory for me.
We continued seeing each other. We
discussed the fact neither of us we’re looking for marriage and children any
time soon but we both enjoyed each other’s company and wanted to pursue this.
There was no rush. We discussed him joining my softball team, camping trips,
and future dates. Neither of us we’re ready for the other to meet our friends
yet (like I said, I have issues with things rushing so this didn’t bother me)
but we always made time to spend with each other. Next thing you knew it had
been 2 months since we started dating. And then it happened…
 |
| #Banksy |
He broke things off with me over a text.
Now, I don’t know about anyone else, but this really bothers me. Maybe
that’s because this just happened last night and it’s still fresh in my mind
and I’m a little bitter. After nearly two months of dating and spending time
(face to face) getting to know someone, how is it socially acceptable to end
something through a text message? That’s the easy way out of an uncomfortable
situation. I’m not the only one who has gone through this, and this
isn’t the first time it has happened to me. I just cannot figure out how a guy
who was such a gentleman, and definitely what you would call a “manly man”
could be such a coward. Why is it so hard to pick up the phone and call, or
meet in person, and just be honest?
I can without a doubt in my mind say that
every time I have had an issue I’ve always asked to discuss it in person rather
than try to deal with it via text message or email. Emotions cannot always be
portrayed properly through written word. People tend to read between the lines
or misinterpret things and everything gets blown further out of proportion. Has it really become too difficult to sit down
in front of someone and tell him or her how you feel and to listen to their
point of view? It really shouldn’t be considering this was our original way of
interaction.
I guess at the end of the day I’m saying
this. This goes for everyone, male or female. Grow a set. So what if it’s hard
and sometimes uncomfortable. At least you will learn how to relate and socially
interact with someone face to face. Sometimes you just have to risk a little
bit of heartbreak to do the right thing by someone else. And also maybe I
should read the JeggerReport before joining dating apps on my phone…
Oh, before I forget to mention it, I have a
date on Wednesday. Old habits die-hard.
-Katelyn
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